a snatched moment of typing - The Musician

So I went out for another dinner with a new guy last night... except this time it was slightly different....

I had not exchanged much information with the gent before agreeing to meet for a drink (drink which became dinner) We had not even officially exchanged first names - Scandalous!! (I found his out with some light weight Internet searching - I am becoming a google-whizz!)

And the dinner event was precluded by some unsettling news. ThatIDon'tWantToTalkAboutHere. Unsettling news that make me want to turtle and hide and think deeply about my feelings and stuff.

So given the effect of the news, I was tense and tired and I decided to throw away the cocky-flirtatious-charming tactics and decided to simply be amenable to an nice evening.

An evening starting with the designated meet-up restaurant being closed on a Monday night! It's nice to keep things unexpected and interesting.

We didn't hit it off like a house on fire but we talked about interesting things, had a laugh or two.

I was secretly pleased he seemed as tongue-tied as me.

Nice-on-the-eyes is always a bonus too.

He is very musically capable (see earlier post about being serenaded with RHCP)

So... I am just going to say this straight out loud. ...in a very uncomplicated way, I would REALLY REALLY REALLY like to see this guy again.

There I said it!

I am petrified that my fidgeting and the occasional bouts of thoughtful silence may have been construed as boredom.

I am afraid that I did not make as good impression.

I am worried he thinks I am too young and immature.

But that may be all self-esteem speaking so the rational-Frank plans to be practical and proactive instead. (When I am finished being a turtle of course)


How do men feel about being actively pursued by a woman?

Coming Clean...

So I joined a dating website a little while ago. Partly out of curiosity, partly out of boredom on a quiet Saturday evening at home and partly for the novelty of taking a personality quiz and getting a tactless answer.

What landed up happening was I got some conflicting answers as to what my personality was and a barrage of messages from all the lonely/equally curious/equally bored singles in the Johannesburg region and surrounds (Does Meyerton count?)

And so spurred on by curiosity(my excuse for now) I replied to the interesting sounding people and ignored the ones that my inner academic snob disdained. (i lik cars wat do u do?), and against my mothers-style of common sense... I am still there.

And it has been overall a more or less positive experience. Barring of course the Capetonian who invited me to fulfill his wild dreams and a religious fanatic....

I met two of the guys I met on the site and only after some very careful vetting of who they are (They both landed up being friends of friends so I could verify some level of non-serial-killerness) One was a business man discussed earlier on the site. (not the use of "was) The other is a fine strapping young man ("nice") of a scientific persuasion ("double nice!") who has two kittens ("BONUS!!! ting ting ting ting ting!!!") Anyway, That story isn't text ready for here yet

I have been corresponding with a few others and one in particular was telling me how he has only had one girlfriend and that he hates his job. So I said the typical "Aaah shames" and "Chin up soldier". Then we got discussing that he wants to study and I imparted some wisdom picked up over the years.

Anyway while I am going on and on and on like a life skills coach about choosing a career and choosing what to study, I realise I have made a mistake in thinking this chap was younger than me and only a few years out of school. In fact, he's 30 years old... So, potentially unemployed, still living with his parents, willing to let me be bossy, and oh! oh! oh! he asked me if I play Call of Chtulhu (ummm... RPG?) all at 30 years old....

My horrible shallow fickle heart is waving a placard... I am a mean judgmental person... but I'll say the long term prospects here are probably limited...

...a...w...k...w...a...r...d....

Good bye October

As cliched as this may sound, I can't believe it is already the end of October. I officially saw my first tv advert with bells and red santa hats and the summer storms have started.

On an aside, I must say that storms make me really crazy-happy. It's something about the power and orchestra of the strong wind and the tree branches dancing wildly and the thunder and the lightning. And then those first big fat rain drops that fall on my windscreen and make a sound like "pop... ... pop ... pop ... pop pop.... pop... Pop pop pop!" For me it makes me feel small and at the same time I admire the great enormous strength behind created nature.

Anyway back to October! It just seems like so much has happened this year. I was expecting a lot of it but it's still like looking back and seeing a long section of uphill and going "No way! I just did all that?"

And I think what I regret is that I have been so busy having everything happen that I haven't gotten to do a lot of things I meant to do. There were some people I met for a short amount of time at the start of the year and I really wanted to drop them a line to say hello. But forgetting them for 10 months might be a bit of a long time lapse to account for. I regret that I have been to quick with the things happening and not fully immersed myself in the change itself. Somedays still I am staggering along. Other days I admire the view. I think it would help if I stopped loosing my to do lists before they're completed!

On a good news note, I FINALLY started drawing again. Not particularly well or anything exciting drawn, but I finally started! Next challenge is to stay started and continue. Techniques next!

I told you so!

I had a kinda stressful day today. Basic low down is that I found a problem in April and I alerted teh relevant authorities and did a whack of research into looking at the problem and evaluating the exact extent of it.

Now finally 6 months down the line the relevant authorities have woken up that something needs to be done and are panicing about it.

i think I should take up a new job in forensic paper work. As in looking at all teh paper work done by all the people that left before you started and figure out what they were thinking when they did these seemingly silly things.

In truth I think If I met the culprit and I knew what he looked like, I would quite like to walk up to him and give him a good kick in the shins. I think it is really irresponsible to leave a project halfway through especially when the thread of the project is coming loose because you didn't do a proper job managing things.

I think a solid kick in the shins with a hard toed boot would be quite satisfying. The kind of kick that leaves a dent for a few hours and a big blue bruise for a few weeks.

Savage yes. but I am annoyed, sorting this mess out is wasting my time!

Unproductivity - Brains like Frozen Syrup

I decided to not start a habit of early mornings. Yesterdays 10 hour day was exhausting. I managed to tick of a whole handful of little things off my to-do list this morning. And then proceeded to have a virtually brain dead afternoon. Hence the blog posting/redecorating.

I had a 100 and something long page document open to read and i just couldn't focus to read it - I think I should analyse when my best time of the day for concentrating on reading is and assign it to then. It certainly isn't straight after lunch.

I am also trying to break some habits

1. No more coffee at work - Coffee-Breath is tres-gross.
2. I am going to try more often to arrive at work before 8am - which means getting up before 7am - which means trying to get to bed before midnight - should be interesting.
3. I am going to try stop checking Facebook 15 times a day (it's like the attention span filler) No body cares - It's like tres-lame to update your status too often anyway
4. I am going to stop using the word tres - it's like so tres-teen-american
(tres - very in french FYI okay?)
5 . I am going to stop thinking about needing to start dating again - I really don't want to and my self-esteem says "No Thank You!" Why bother - my heart isn't in it anyway.

I have a planning meeting this evening for the training we will present this weekend about the trip to Germany. I would give anything to get out the house... and the lady meeting me doesn't want to go out for coffee... sigh... another evening at home again.

Red eye morning

So I managed to get myself to work today BEFORE 7am! I usually breeze in around 8:30am most days. If you do the maths, Yes I got up before my alarm clock and skipped yucky porridge and zoomed off to work (which even if I leave 90 minutes earlier, is still a nightmare)

Anyway what inspired getting up with the sparrows (or at least the same time as the rest of the family) and arriving before everyone else in my department is that I wanted to discuss something through with one of the senior chaps and he said, "Okay, I can make time for you between 7:30 and 9:30 because I will be in a meeting after that" And so to maintain the tactical advantage, I decided to arrive before him. 35 minutes! High Five Frankie!

It doesn't necessarily mean ill be leaving 90 minutes early to go home however... I have a lot to do and I left early on Monday... So Ill catch up the time today so this is going to be one loooong ass day...

whoops!

Sorry previous post is MONOLITHIC! this is a short one to balance it out! :D

(saying just about the same amount of usefulness!)