Lesson Three

Number Three [ta daaa!]: Pay attention to other peoples problems

When someone has a problem, like a general life issue, pay attention, find out about it, listen to their regrets. And why you ask? because you can learn from it. You know the sage wisdom, "You can only learn by making mistakes." Well learn from other peoples mistakes too. It's like getting more than 24 hours of life experiences out of a day.

True story: when I was in matric I was quite close to someone who had recently graduated with pretty cool fun degree and couldn't find a job doing what she loved. So she became a teacher. And as much as she is a brilliant teacher now and she loves her job, 7 years ago she wasn't exactly charmed to have to trade in the original career for the (then interim) teaching post. I paid attention and one of the criteria for myself choosing what to study at university was What will guarantee me a job? now I took a bit of a scenic route to getting my engineering degree and perhaps the hand of the Almighty turned my 6 year path to graduation into a blessing but I have no regrets. I attended one and a half ( the half is a weird story) interviews and I really enjoy my job and I am doing really well.

My brother has had various issues in the process of acquiring his first car and dealing with shameless car salesmen that really just did my boet out of his money and sold him a dud vehicle - and boy oh boy I tell you I paid attention and I won't fall for the same trick.

Now it sucks, it really stinks that bad things happen to people. and that life is a bumpy road. and that things are not always easy. and that some times naive people get screwed over by people with no moorals. But there really is no point in living thru the same drama more than once. Make their regrets your path and give them no opportuinity to say "I told you so". Because I know when I failed second year and again when I fail third year I did a lot of soul searching and a lot of thinking about how I could have done things better. And I wish I could have warned myself.

So be sympathetic and listen and ask all the questions that politly imply that you want all the juicy details and take surreptitious notes. (Which salesman is completely useless? H-E-N-R-I?)

But make other peoples life lessons your life lessons (with out of course being one of those super paranoid annoying crazy people - because then you won't have any friends left to learn from)