Ridiculously boring soccer

I have arrived at the opinion that as exciting and fun soccer is, and as much as I am way too addicted to it for a non-sports-lover, Soccer where after and hour in is still nil all is the most boring waste of time ever.

I would feel cheated to pay to watch a soccer match and not get any of the scoring drama. All that tension with no satisfaction. Like being promised free stuff and being lured into a sales presentation instead.

Maybe I am being a little old lady about this. I had a bad day okay...

(and as I type this Spain scores, The pub erupts and Portugal starts chasing)

So I think Ill stop complaining and start focusing... On the Ridiculously Interesting Soccer!

Oh Subtle one!

If you haven't guessed already, as I have restricted my self from all other outlets, Imma gonna be blogging a lot. The benefit in this is that it is a mostly one way line of communication so I am actually getting rid of ideas from my head without adding new ones at the same time (Winner!)

 

Funny story of the day:

 

(was it today or yesterday hmmm... nevermind...) So I was sitting in our open plan office where sound travels pretty nicely and I overhearing a project manager discussing with a graduate (let's call this graduate Susan) that the proposal that they were assembling was running very close to the submission deadline and that Susan really should be hurrying up. The exact words were "See Susan, it really does take time to put these things together" (sarcasm dripping)

 

(Aside; It makes me highly amused when people use other people's first names in conversation to be extra demeaning and condescending - in this case I think however that Susan probably earned it)

 

As it happens Susan is supposed to be working on a proposal with me that has a slightly less close deadline. So first I have had the noise of the crickets from him for over a week since he was given the assignment to work with me. And then today (after major flying fecal matter and panic stations on a completely unrelated set of events in my own work) he comes to me and proceeds to badger me for 15 minutes about how we have to get the proposal information and that it must be done like yesterday and why haven't I completed it yet and I am not taking things seriously...

 

Subtle how he managed to make that mental leap? Yeah take it out on me that the Project Manager put you in your place Susan, real mature move buddy.

 

(Yes Susan is a male, I am irked, he gets em-feminine-ated)

 

Okay Venting over, back to my panic stations... (or lunch first perhaps)

Fasting Day 1

So it was both easier than I thought and quite difficult to not be trawling the interweb for entertainment.

The easy part was that I suddenly was focusing on doing other work when my concentration ran out on the work tasks. So between writing letters i was phoning people and wandering around the office picking up information. It actually worked to my benefit because I found time to discover that an important proposal I have couriered had got lost and I was able to phone and get it rerouted to arrive before it's Wednesday deadline. Yaay for me!

The trouble is that I actually spent a lot of today waiting for a response from other people and so I actually had the time to be checking Facebook and Twitter and Blogs and the News and the webcomics.

But tomorrow is another day and perhaps the itch to be connected with the multiverse will be weaker. So far so good :)

I was wandering around a bookstore this evening (as I am prone to do...) and found this little gem...

Hmmm...

Moving on. Mr Thursday and I have navigated a peace treaty of sorts. Well in fact I pondered and mulled over my thoughts all weekend and then this evening we met and I talked and he listened. Now it is time for Mr T to ponder and then I think sometime soon Ill have to do some listening while he talks... and whether either of us will come out of this happy in the end is yet to be discovered. Time will tell. Wisdom and wise moves are not easily something hurried.

In the meanwhile Ill leave you to the horror of Jane Austen + Zombies... or Sea Monsters...

Fasting - Day 0.25

Okay so I am struggling. I decided that radio was out too so the morning alarm clock was changed to buzzer - Never a good way to start the week. Especially since I overslept after dreaming about beating up a skinny diabetic man. - Wake up late with a guilt trip Wooo hooo fun times.

 

Anyway I am hoping to manage to not respond to the comments on my Taking a Break from Facebook status post.

 

As for listening for less head noise - no progress so far...

 

Found a good book to read instead tho. It is about travelling and figuring out love.

Fasting

So by my previous post it must be apparent that this are running a little amok in my life... And not in a good way.

So now that I have had a quiet mostly alone-ly weekend to gather my thoughts, I can issue an official statement... of sorts (yeah this may be a long post)

I don't really wanna talk about what has gone wrong between me and Mr Thursday. We reached a disagreement, lines were drawn in the sand, mean things were said, a sad long hug was exchanged and we retreated to our caves to ponder.

Then word got out and some turned to tissues and weeping and others turned to anger and bold statements to the public (yeah the masculine/feminine associated reactions there are correct)

In pondering I think I will take anger (however as hurtful) anyday before apathy. At least if Mr Thursday is angry it means he cares.

(quick accidentally left off fact, Things aren't 100% over completely... From the outsiders perspective, It could go either way, I get a final (or not so Final) pass at forgiveness/heartbreakness tomorrow)

And so anger means he cares about the outcome. He isn't letting go easily. And there are far more hurtful ways to get back at me. For example, Finding a fling as the first reaction to a break - up would cut me to the heart because it would say to me that the most needy thing missing since I am gone is the physical side for an entire carefully constructed grown and loved relationship. (True Story, I don't point fingers but I may be accused of embroidering the facts)

So what I am saying is Facebook posts and vindictive unfriending and malicious changing of profile pictures and relationship status' and getting drunk with the buddies and status-updating is Hurtful Yes... But it shows that something genuine existed in the first place and the gap is being bridged by his friends. Make Sense? (yeah I refuse to be offended Take that Mr T's friends!!)

So I have spent the weekend mostly meditating and thinking and introspecting over why it is we came to our disagreement anyway. And I seem to notice a sort of stagnantion of unresolved problems in my life. Some issues I haven't really put to bed. And I think some of the stagnantion comes from the fact that it is so hard to concentrate on one problem at a time. There is such a blur of social media flying into my head all the time. Too many distracting ideas.

And so I get onto the allusion of the blog heading. I plan on taking a fast from social media for a week to try shut down some of the noise in my brain

NO
- Facebook (honestly I doubt anyone will notice)
- twitter (ditto)
- reading other blogs
- web comics
- buzz
- tv shows
- movies
- interweb news
- checking my email 30 times a day

I will allow myself to watch The Soccer (it's transient - Ill miss out if I don't) and check my email for important subject headings.

What I intend to do with the freed up time is to focus on Why I feel what I feel and why I don't feel what I don't feel and whet the difference is. Also Dream out what I really plan to do with my time for the next year/5years/20 years. (And let us not forget to focus on work would be good between 8 and 5...)

So an almost retreat. Specifically Facebook brings a lot of unnecessary hurt into my life, added fact being that running personal relationships via facebook is about as tacky as giving someone a birthday present of half a slab of fudge when you work at a sweet shop and you get a who slab everyday for free and ate some of the gift first. So basically not cool and very impersonal as well as reminding everyone your life is awesome and theirs is not.

So wish me well on my fast. Midnight strikes soon so I gotta enjoy the media while I can.

Wish me persistance and self control and some wise answers!

Heart break

I should come with a hazardous to hearts sign...

 

Mr Thursday and I are kinda sorta on the road to breaking up...

 

No I don't want to talk about it yet. 

Proposal is in! It's Party Time!

So I finally finished the report... And by finished I mean I stayed at work until 9 printing and binding and scanning and packaging and sealing and carrying.



And so amidst the fears of pandemonium to the happening today because "Feel It, WC day is Finally Here" I got up far too early, Down some coffee and drove through to the Report Submission Centre to make sure there would be absolutely no reason to not be able to hand in.


(My bid manager had some smarmy comments how I should have been finalising the day before yesterday to be printing yesterday morning and delivering yesterday afternoon - While is kinda pointless to say at 5pm when I can do nothing but continue printing and binding and sealing and scanning - I think his speech was more about asserting that he is a better Engineer - well Duuuh He has 20 years more experience at it)


Funny enough I actually coped much much better with this Proposal than the previous onces - this is evidenced by the lack of blog posts lamenting my sad sorry work life while sitting at work at 10pm. And I feel good about the package I am handing in - I am a little scared that I have forgotten something :/ I grasp the idea that this bid in particular is actually pretty important.


The other thing worrying me is that my department manager sent me a BEE company to include as a subcontractor. However the aformention Bid Manger suggested that their skill set is so similar to ours that by including them we would be actually risking loosing business to them at a later stage. So they were left out. My department head followed this up with me yesterday as I was printing docs and was uumm... Noticibly irked that the BEE company was not included. (I kinda sorta effectively ignored my BIG Boss's instructions on the advice of my Medium big Boss)


Question is, Would it have been the moral thing to do to include the company as a BEE company to give some little guys a leg up into the market with the potential loss of business to the company? Which is more important, doing the kind generous thing or doing what is better for maintaining the competitive edge and the money coming in?


Anyway back to the original story. I arrive here nice and early and it seems that my proposal package won't fit into the submission postbox so I have to wait until the office opens in an hours time. Which means Ill be leaving here and driving through the centre of town in peak morning traffic... But at least my bid will be in right?

bla bla busy busy bla

It's always the same old story really - just to busy to put anything really worth reading down here.



What is keeping me busy is:



1. a really important proposal.


The reason why this particular proposal is so scary important is that it is for a renewal of a contract for a company that is in the same country and same city as our business. and so it would be COMPLETELY REDONCkULOUS if we did not get this contract award. No Pressure Frankis! and to add complication to the stress, the person who assembled the invitation to tender document sleeps in a cage in the monkey section of the zoo and it was pretty darned hard to figure out in the first place what I was supposed to be putting together for this document of great importance!



2. Baking



I have continued to indulge my new found love of baking. I made banana bread successfully (but had to buy mushy over ripe bananas in the first place to be able to have the right ingredients. and then had a leftover aging banana staring at me from my lemon styled fruit bowl for a week.) The banananaa bread was delicious and enjoyed by all. (until it got old and then it was enjoyed by just me)

Then I attempted Gemmer Koekies (at Mr Thursdays request) and gave them an extra 5 minutes baking time because (as per Mr Thursday's instructions) gemmer koekies are supposed to be crisp. I have a tin of Gemmer Rusks now that are quite delicious but equally hard to bite into unless you dunk them in your coffee first. (sorry no photos of the gemmer koekies)

my next idea is to try making beer bread. I am fascinated by the idea of baking my own bread. and hopefully by making this recipe, I can avoid all the confusion about getting the yeast mixed in and how long to leave it to rise and all and all and all.



3. Brownies


I am still running the Brownie Pack that I took over from a school friend last year. and while I really enjoy it and I adore my seven special girls I find it is a whole lot more work than it ever was when I wasn't the one in charge. and so the spare time on the weekends get take up with getting Brownies organised for a Monday evening. And added to this is the fact that the Regional Commisioner planned celebratory activities for the entire year for the centenary of Girl Guiding so there's a lot of dancing and crafting and camping and meeting-ing over teh weekends in general. Lucky Girls at least. (sorry for us)



4. Mr Thursday


He just keeps on hanging around. Even when I am mean to him and Even when I get pissy and kick him out my little house into the cold and Even when my Banana Bread give him a belly ache... (that's anotehr story not to be retold anytime soon)
Maybe if I stop feeding him he will stop pitching up.

Okay jokes aside. I will admit it is kinda cool to have some one who is fond of you and smiles like a little child when you make edible food. It's kinda cool getting gifts and stuff... And while I have always said that I enjoy being single... I seem to have adapted to being not single pretty scarily fast.. (more thought on this on my tumblr perhaps if I ever get around to starting it properly - don't ask for the address yet, unless you have the energy to substitute blogspot with tumblr)



5. Sleeping


I don't get to do it often enough and as it is winter it is pretty darned awesome thing to do everyday - trouble is it is hard to stop. I am persistently the last person in the department at work to arrive. Hence why I am blogging from work at 6:30pm.



And I think a 5 point list is just about enough for now :)



I think I might just pack up and make an entry into the chilly soccer obsessed city now. (I can hear one lonely vuvuzela blasting still)